How to Become Stoic (+Best Books on Stoicism)

Stoicism and being able to be stoic and calm in tough situations is a modern-day superpower. So how to become stoic?

Firstly, it’s good to know that to a stoic, your opinion of yourself means more to you than other peoples opinions of you, and you won’t feel it in a negative way if some people disagree with you.

A stoic who knows his own values and has a strong sense of his own reality won’t be easily distressed by outside feedback from other people.

This modern world needs stoics more than anything. Learning how to become stoic will benefit anyone more than perhaps any other thing will.

What Is Stoicism?

Stoicism was founded in Athens by Zeno in the early 3rd century BC. He was a merchant who suffered a shipwreck, losing everything and discovering philosophy in the process.

Stoicism placed great emphasis on goodness and peace of mind gained from living a life of virtue in accordance with nature.

It became very popular, flourishing as one of the major schools of philosophy from the era.

The next three most famous stoics illustrates well how diverse a philosophy stoicism is:

• Marcus Aurelius the wise virtuous Roman Emperor, the most powerful man on the earth at the time.
• Epictetus who was born a slave who’d go on to found his own philosophical school and become a powerful speaker whose time was sought after by eminent figures.
• Seneca who was Rome’s most famous playwright, political advisor and one of the richest man in Rome.

So in a way, this philosophy was designed both for extreme adversity like poverty & slavery and also for extreme success and for people with power, wealth and influence.

Stoicism and Epicureanism

Many years ago when I saw this interesting video on “Toughen Up” topic, I became very intrigued in stoicism.

A nation is born Stoic and dies Epicurean.

Will Durant

Ultimately Stoics were people who had a strong belief in sacrificing something in the now to get better things later.

“A primary aspect of Stoicism involves improving the individual’s ethical and moral well-being: “Virtue consists in a will that is in agreement with Nature.” – Wikipedia

Epicureans were people who lived for pleasure and partied in this moment without worry of tomorrow.

“Epicureanism is a form of hedonism insofar as it declares pleasure to be its sole intrinsic goal, the concept that the absence of pain and fear constitutes the greatest pleasure, and its advocacy of a simple life.” – Epicureanism (philosophy)

Historian Will Durant said that great nations and greatest companies are built by people who sacrifice present enjoyment to hard work now for a brighter future.

Why Stoicism? What’s The Benefit?

If you think about it, stoicism wins epicureanism. This whole modern world is basically built by the Stoics, not by the Epicurean.

So, we all should strive to be more Stoic. We should study how to become Stoic and implementing what we’ve learned, and continuing to always learn more.

Because you know, modern people are often such a cry babies complaining about how their Internet isn’t fast enough and this and that page takes ages to load.

Or about the 30 minute waiting line in the airport.

Some even get annoyed for some mere 2 minute wait on the grocery store waiting line.

That’s basically Epicurean, just wanting pleasure and not working for the better future. If all people were more Stoic, there is no doubt that the world would be a lot better place for everyone.

Would Modern Era Men Really Benefit From Stoicism?

But isn’t stoicism just some old philosophy that has no bearing on the modern age, some might ask.

Well, I’d disagree with that. And you don’t have to look further for evidence than watching modern people and men, some of them would vastly benefit from implementing a bit of stoicism in their lives.

Let’s face it; most modern men have lost it when it comes to comparing against old-time Roman Emperors or Spartans.

Modern men are often too emotional, and that also is something the mainstream media pushes as their agenda to get men to be “more sensitive”.

Every single man knows how does that work out with for example the ladies. They said they want emotional sensitive man and you followed suit…

How did that work out? What did your emotional sack of feelings cause you? In some cases, it has contributed to her becoming their ex.

Stoicism Brings Men More Success With Women?

Yes…

One of the benefits that stoicism brings: It brings men more success with women.

But do not believe me, try it for yourself and remember that on some things it’s not good to listen to what they say, but rather watch what they do…

In regards to human nature, watching what humans do will always teach you more than words that are said.

Are the majority of women head-over-heels attracted for emotional, crying, sensitive “bubbly” men? Or are they head-over-heels attracted towards strong stabile stoic like men figures?

If you have any experience with women, you know the answer.

And that’s just one of the many benefits that implementing stoic philosophy brings.

If you’re interested in further reading on this attraction topic, then be sure to read: How Men Can Become More Attractive

But let’s study more on the stoic topic, shall we? Stoicism and its benefits are something that every man needs to experience and live by.

How to Become Stoic?

So “how to become stoic?” you may be asking now.

As said in the “Toughen Up” video at the start of this article, there are things that you can do to toughen up so to speak.

And that can directly translate into becoming more stoic as a overall person.

“It is in times of security that the spirit should be preparing itself for difficult times; while fortune is bestowing favors on it is then is the time for it to be strengthened against her rebuffs.”

Seneca

In modern time we have high levels of security, so in essence if you’re thinking how to become stoic then you need to put yourself in situations where you can “harden up” so to speak.

There is no other way to live. We have no wars or dark times or the plague. Yes, that is a good thing, but we have to practice what we fear and sometimes ditch the modern comfort to become more stoic.

What Should I Do to Become More Stoic? (List of Suggestions)

Here are listed few practical things you can start doing to become more stoic, some can be quite controversial:

• Intermittent fasting for 24 hours and more
• Sleeping on the ground, camping outdoors, etc
• Meditating and being still with our own thoughts
• Not spending any money for a certain period like for a week
• Practicing martial arts or boxing etc
• Lifting weights
• Long walks for hours
• Cold showers to experience something you dread
• Being without mobiles or the Internet for a week
• Reading books
• Taking the stairs instead of the comforting elevator
• Not watching TV or news for some period
• Putting yourself into voluntary celibacy and disregarding sexual pleasure
• Working more and even avoiding vacations
• Forget your car and walk or bicycle your way to grocery store/workplace more often
• Isolate yourself for a certain period to learn why Seneca said: “There is no enjoying the possession of anything valuable unless one has someone to share it with”

An Element of Struggle Is Needed to Become More Stoic?

Like you can see above, in most points, there’s an element of struggle. Putting yourself through struggle. That is something that is essential in making you improve.

The struggle is what makes you. Not the opulent easy life where you have no struggles. In modern times there is no better way than for example lifting weights to become more stoic.

It’s almost essential, in my opinion, to put yourself through things like these to grow as a person.

Of course, you shouldn’t shun having a good enjoyable life, but these are something to practice more in our modern, rather comforting time (when compared to earlier generations).

Most of us have seen this quote and in a way it’s a very stoic quote:

Hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard times.

G. Michael Hopf

Now everything is a bit easier and there are no struggles like mankind used to have. You have to self impose those struggles via practices like intermittent fasting, lifting weights, hiking, camping, etc.

Misfortune and struggle was the norm for earlier generations and for that reason they were automatically more mentally stronger people than current modern men.

Now with our modern technological advancements, it is on you to self impose “misfortune” so to speak. In a way that’s beneficial to you in the aftermath.

Even meditation can be a quite struggling journey for some people who struggle being still with their thoughts and emotions. It’s very enlightening to learn to meditate and do it as a habit.

Going through struggle is very beneficial in regards to creating stronger you.

Reading on Stoicism to Become More Stoic

Also, in my opinion, there’s no better way to become more stoic than reading a lot on stoicism. Reading every day some bits from the best stoics from the history.

Also reading some modern-day writings and compilations on stoicism, something that is packed in an easily digestible way to give insight into modern day living.

You can learn so much from the thoughts and writings from stoics like Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius.

You can literally tap into their brain and thoughts via their personal journal that they wrote for themselves.

There is so much value in this, and more importantly, reading it daily to immerse your thoughts in this information bit by bit.

This, combined into living and experiencing situations where you can apply these things, teaches you how to become stoic like in your own life.

So you’re probably asking now what are the best books on stoicism to learn from? Let’s get into it…

Best Books on Stoicism

There’s a wide array of books on stoicism, for a beginner it’s very hard to just compile and find some of the best books on stoicism. But here’s listed basically the meat & potatoes on this subject.

You could be good today. But instead you choose tomorrow.

Marcus Aurelius

In no particular order few of the best books on stoicism…

Meditations by Marcus Aurelius

First, we have to realize that the author of this text, Marcus Aurelius, was a Roman Emperor and
Meditations is the private notebook of the wise virtuous Emperor. In my opinion, everyone should’ve been forced to read this from a young age.

This is quite possibly the most insightful, existential book one can ever read. Emperor Marcus Aurelius has given us wisdom in its purest form. This needs to be a manual for every human’s life.

A must have and must read and must live-by book for virtually every person alive.

Meditations: A New Translation by Marcus Aurelius

Today I escaped anxiety. Or no, I discarded it, because it was within me, in my own perceptions — not outside.

Marcus Aurelius

Seneca’s Stoic Books

Seneca’s books on stoicism are probably one of the most popular books on stoic philosophy.

Seneca was a famous playwright, political advisor and one of the richest man in Rome.

The stoic writings from the philosopher Seneca, who was born in Cordoba, Spain and lived from c. 5 BC to AD 65, offer profound insights into the art of living.

If you really want to escape the things that harass you, what you’re needing is not to be in a different place but to be a different person.

Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Practical wisdom to help you navigate in a hectic world giving you introspection.

Letters from a Stoic by Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Seneca’s another one is a classic that is a very small and short book.

But the shortness of the book makes it even more profound and packed with profound wisdom…

The wisdom that you are in awe of while witnessing these writings in your own hands.

Life is short. But life is actually long if you know how to use it.

Seneca’s great ideas and stoic philosophies from this book need to be taught in schools.

On the Shortness of Life: Life Is Long if You Know How to Use It by Seneca

Discourses and Selected Writings by Epictetus

Epictetus stoic teachings are one of the most famous teachings on stoicism.

As a Greek-Roman philosopher, Epictetus became one of the most influential thinkers of his time.

Epictetus was born a slave who’d go on to found his own philosophical school and become a powerful speaker. His time was sought after by eminent figures wanting to have a conversation with him.

Remember from now on whenever something tends to make you unhappy, draw on this principle: ‘This is no misfortune; but bearing with it bravely is a blessing.’

Epictetus

In his mind philosophy is a way of life and not just a theoretical discipline. To Epictetus, all events are determined by fate and are in a way beyond our control.

He argues that we should accept whatever happens with calmness. But we must acknowledge that individuals are responsible for their own actions, which they can view and control through extreme self-discipline.

Don’t hope that events will turn out the way you want, welcome events in whichever way they happen: this is the path to peace.

Epictetus

All the gems, the diamonds that come from his writings in the form of famous quotes are worth it to study his writings.

Discourses and Selected Writings by Epictetus

Unshakable Freedom: Ancient Stoic Secrets Applied to Modern Life

This book is a more modern take on how to become stoic in modern life.

The book asks how can we attain true and total personal freedom in modern life?

The stoics gave us the blueprint for personal freedom, so yes, it can be attained.

The ancient Stoics knew that true freedom comes from choosing wisely. And this book reveals these stoic principles for modern readers.

Unshakable Freedom: Ancient Stoic Secrets Applied to Modern Life by Chuck Chakrapani

Best Book for a Beginner?

In my opinion, The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday is absolutely the best book for beginners to start learning stoic philosophy.

Why?

Because the book has basically a stoic philosophy for every day of the year, it’s like a one-page lesson for every day of the year.

For example, if you’re getting The Daily Stoic book in December, you can open December 10th page and read the daily stoic lesson and ponder on it for the day and put it on the use on that day.

The next day there comes the next daily stoic lesson, and so on, for every single day of the year.

This is why this book is so VALUABLE, that I’m extremely happy about getting it for myself. And everyone whom I’ve recommended it has absolutely loved it.

Even for People Who Are Not Readers

Even non-readers and people who aren’t fans of reading books absolutely love this book, as there’s basically only a short page to read for every day.

Of course, you can read it more, but I think if you’re asking how to become stoic, then there’s a huge value and benefit to learn the lessons on a daily basis schedule and put some effort into pondering the lesson of the day.

This way the stoic philosophy sticks on you when you read on stoicism every day and also perhaps do some journaling with helpful tools like The Five Minute Journal, or The Daily Stoic Journal, or just a blank journal the same time.

You can read this over for many years in a row, or even the rest of your life read the daily page while waiting for your coffee in the morning. Such a fantastic book reminding you daily on how to think.

This way you won’t ever lose the values that are taught. Short daily excerpt from the greatest stoics is a great way to keep stoicism in your mind.

The Daily Stoic is one of the books that I recommend to get only as a physical version and to definitely SKIP the audiobook, it’s way more valuable as a physical book and you’ll more likely follow-up reading the daily pages if you have the book on your table.

If you wanna gift someone (perhaps gift yourself) with an astounding book that benefits them 100% surely, I’d look no further:

The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living by Ryan Holiday

Best Books on Stoicism Conclusion

To conclude best books on stoicism here’s a quick list of them (links to Amazon.com).

• Meditations: A New Translation by Marcus Aurelius
• Letters from a Stoic by Lucius Annaeus Seneca
• On the Shortness of Life: Life Is Long if You Know How to Use It by Seneca
• Discourses and Selected Writings by Epictetus
• Unshakable Freedom: Ancient Stoic Secrets Applied to Modern Life by Chuck Chakrapani

There is a vast amount of more literature on stoicism, but these are some of the best books on stoicism that one can read, and I recommend these highly to have these on your bookshelf.

Personally, I prefer most of these as an audiobook and always grab the Audible audiobook if it’s available. It’s great to listen to these while having long forest park walks.

Conclusion

If you’re reading this today, you know the world has changed a lot if you compare it to earlier days. That’s why many argue that in our modern rather “comfort zone” lifestyle it’s essential to practice some form of “misfortune” to become more stoic as a person.

This means that in modern times we have to self impose struggles on ourselves. Whether it be fasting for up to many days, lifting heavy weights, taking a “fast” from mobile phones, sleeping and camping outdoors, etc.

This way you’ll become a better person, a happier person, a stronger person. You’ll learn to endure the hardships everyone will face in their lifetime and endure them better, in a more stoic way that’s extremely beneficial and calming to you.

Ultimately the question “how to become stoic” is something that will get answered the best way when you start to read daily on the topic of stoicism.

There is no better way to study and implement stoicism and stoic philosophies into your own life than reading on it on the daily.

And then having introspection on the lessons and applying them on the situations you encounter in your day to day life, and also meditating on it every day. To a stoic, meditation is a powerful tool.

The best books on stoicism listed above are something that should be in every public library, school buildings bookshelves, studied in schools and homes for achieving a better life and ultimately better mankind.

In my opinion, reading books like The Daily Stoic is one of the best ways to implement learning and keeping stoic philosophies in your everyday life.
(You can find it from Amazon)

Journaling is also a big part on how to become stoic, as the best books on stoicism are essentially the stoics own journals that are now compiled into books that can be read by the modern people.

Tap into the mind of Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius via his own manual and apply the profound wisdom into your own life, and the same time doing some quick journaling on your experiences from the day as these stoics did.

Soon you’ll live a better life yourself and have your own stoic journal and manual to life, having better control over your emotions and ultimately your whole life. Becoming the role model and an example to follow for people around you.